Trusting takes time

“I therefore, a prisoner of the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.” — Ephesians 4:1-3

I’ve been here for 7 months now, Gosh it doesn’t feel that long, and loving it here. Every day is like a new piece of art that lets me discover more of the bigger masterpiece. Now some pieces of art makes me mad and think, “Really? Why can’t things just get fixed now? Like, how hard is to show up at our agreed upon time? Or, “Smog go away I wish I could see the blue skies or stars at night!” How selfish of me huh?! Living here, you definitely need to learn to laugh off things and be patient. I went to the fabric market and tried to get curtains made; however, when you tell them 150cm instead of 250cm, you end up with curtains that come halfway down the window. Whoops. You go to Hong Kong for a visa run and figure, why not buy some olive oil and bring it back? However, in customs you place the bag that contains the bottle of olive oil down too hard and crack it, causing its contents to drip out walking through customs. I had to join in and laugh with the guards and cleaning people since, I mean, what else could I have done? Hahahaaha! Life here is interesting. Well, I keep it interesting and entertaining. It’s funny, the verse above talks about walking out in patience that’s the message this past month been teaching, patience.

So in my spare time I been reading. A LOT. Not having internet in my apartment for the past month also aids this rediscovered passion. In Crazy Love by Francis Chan, he records the immortal words of Brook Bronkowski, “You see, I’ll be one of those people who live to be history makers at a young age. Oh, I’ll have moments, good and bad, but I will wipe away the bad and only remember the good. In fact that’s all I remember, just good moments, nothing in between, just living my life to the fullest. I’ll be one of those people who go somewhere with a mission, an awesome plan, a world-changing plan, and nothing will hold me back. I’ll set an example for others, I will pray for direction.” Preach sis! 

Let’s, for a moment, scrape away color and culture and focus on the human beings, male and female. I will go out on the limb and say inside every male lies this desire to be the author of his own life. In John Eldredge’s book, Wild at Heart, he would say their lies a spirit of a warrior, lover, adventure seeker and risk taker. Unfortunately, circumstance whether life or Satan wants this God-design spirit of ours to be twisted and our fire snuffed out. Broskis, when did you lose this spirit? Now to play it safe, I will share what Eldredge believes inside every female is the following desires: “to be romanced, to play an irreplaceable role in a great adventure, and to unveil beauty.”

Don’t you see life and circumstances thrown your way are to give way for opportunities to grow and mature? Yet we all want that job that solves all our money problems as quick as I can *snap* my fingers without the grueling years of sacrifice and work. We want our current desires of pleasure, instant gratification, and all the worldly fun we see on TV and hear in music, now in this life. Because, why wait, right? Why wait for the next year or the next life? So the truth is: We want things our way right now. Yet, ever since our forefather and mother wanted the knowledge of good and evil, it doomed our lives to a constant hunger and thirst for things that do not satisfy.

Society’s idea of Christianity and sometimes the American church is a bit off. What I have noticed is they’ve lost the zeal and passion that comes with following the True Lord, the Everlasting God. When one believes in Christ, a new regeneration of oneself should occur, but unfortunately at times people just want to “check the Christian box” or ticket to heaven card without truly having to expose their all to the King of Kings. Accepting Christ is a regeneration into a new person. Your old self is dead and you are a new creation, though at times, people are still living out in their old self yet claim to be Christians. We lost the passion and truth that comes all with following Christ. Listen to how Blaise Pascal describes his encounter and transformation:

 The Year of grace 1654

Monday, November 23, day of saint Clamant, pope and martyr,

and others in the martyrology.

Vigil of Saint Chrysogonus, martyr, and others.

From about ten-thirty in the evening to about half an hour after



God of Abraham, God of Isaac, God of Jacob,

Not of the philosophers and savants.

Certitude, certitude; feeling, joy, peace.

God of Jesus Christ.

Deum meum et Deum vestrum.

“Thy God shall be muy God.”

Forgetting the world and everything except God. He is only found by the paths taught in the Gospel.

Grandeur of the human soul.

“Just Father, the world has not known you, but

I have known you.”

Joy, joy, joy, tears of joy.

I separated myself from him: Dereliquerent me fontem aquae vivae.

“My God, will you abandon me?”

May I not be eternally separated from him.

“This is eternal life, that they know you, the only true God,and

Him whom you have sent, Jesus Christ.”

Jesus Christ.

Jesus Christ.

I separated myself from him; I fled him, renounced him,

Crucified him.

May I never be separated from him!

He is only kept by the opaths taught in the Gospel.

Total submission to Jesus Christ and to my director.

Eternally in joy for a day of trial on earth.

Non obliviscar sermons tuos. Amen.

That, my chicos and chicas, is an encounter with the Holy of Holies. The best part is that I’ve been meeting people that have had an experience like that where they too have had stories like Pascal. Gosh, how I wish to one day, in my old age, record my encounters with the Creator here on earth before I go and meet Him. We need to stop settling for the half-in half-out mentality of Christianity and realize…it requires our whole heart.


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